Everything burnt

I quit the job. 

Hmm actually I haven't officially join. 

I done medical fitness, visa, IC, bank account for salary n my uniform. 

Supposed shud report duty as soon as possible after gt my uniform. 

But then I've been told have to wear it only when I gt my uniform. I can't accept it. 

When I was so excited I received my offer letter, i can work at O&G department, my dream to work at O&G, at least have chance to get midwife cert, n oso can leave 3U. 

U noe, i decided to sacrifce what i have there, to leave my friends there, to pay for 35K, just to reach my dream. 

Well, I'm here now, just have to report duty and I going to start my dream. 

Just one more step. 

But unfortunately I can't step it in. 

I really cant. >.<

So well, everything burnt, everything gone. My dream, my friends and my job. 

I'm sad. 

I gt my uniform on Wednesday, I cried after get into the car. 

Crying is a stupid act i noe. 

But i cant control it.

It fell. 

Told them when get into the car.

Guess what I got?

Scold n laughs.

When I was sad n hope can get some consolation from them. 

But well.

It was just a f*cking idiot thought ever!

No even 1 better word, at least just to make me comfort a little bit. Just a little bit.

I was wrong, I expected too much from them! It just too much! 

Expecting someone who treat his wife badly, or mayb can use terrible, to give some better word to make u comfort?! 

WHO ARE YOU?

It just another f*cking stupid expectation!

I keep thinking what can n what shud I do. 

It's my dream! 

I really wan to reach my dream

Just one more step

Just one!! >.<. 

I'm here

But I can't 

I can't accept it :'(

Yes its 3k per month

I wish to save money, to reach my dream.

But at the same time I wish I can protect my dignity, and work happily,proudly.

Ever mentioned: the road I chose, I will walk it happily.

Yes I chose tis.

But I can't walk happily wit it. 

So now I have to choose to leave.

Another road. 

Noe tat feeling?

Almost touch the dream but u fell!

It just like u climb harder n harder n harder n one more step to reach the top of the highest mountain in the world but then u fell to the bottom of the mountain. 

Told sis, bro, Mr Hong and May. 

I'm happy my sis support my decision to leave here. 

I thought bro disagree wit my decision.

I'm sad when my family didnt support my decision.

I'm sad I can't reach my dream n at the same time I'm sad my family didn't support my decision to leave.

I decided to leave my dream, to leave here. But I just nid my family to support my decision so tat I won't feel like I'm alone. 

Told Mr. Hong bout tat, he said shud tell them wats in my mind, my feeling, my thoughts n my plan. He said 3choices, 1: just work for ur dream 2: leave ur house 3:

Before the 3rd choice, I said I reli do think to leave the house, leave my family n leave everyone here.

I noe it's a stupid thought. 

But I'm rely sad when I can't get my family supports. :'(

I'm stupid, used to think nonsense whenever I'm sad. :(

The officer advised to have a try

She said it just a part of uniform.

But I rely can't accept it.

Prefer to leave the dream.

Dream is just a dream. :'(